When I went into the program I thought I had everything nailed down, but everything started hitting me back. I didn’t get my unemployment and they turned me down for Social Security. I couldn’t get up and when I came home my job was gone, even though they promised me it would be there. Trust me, it was very hard to pick up my confidence and start all over again.
But I believe in God and I know if He means well — He will give and I will receive. In these types of times, you feel as though all things are falling down. When you try and try and try and try again, no matter what you do, things don’t come out in your favor.
They even rejected my state tax. Now I have nothing to depend on, plus my car broke down. I’m about to get put out of my apartment and remember, I don’t have a job and no type of income. But all is well. I believe in God. He is the almighty God and with Him, anything can happen and I believe He’s holding on for something big for me. But when I came home I was in a slump. I couldn’t pick myself up. I started back drinking but I’m realizing I’m not the only one that goes through this stuff — everybody has hard times, bad times, bad luck, whatever you want to call it.
But when you believe in God, He’s going to come for you and He’s going to help you put one step forward. He’ll take two more steps for you. I depend on Him and I know He depends on me because without Him there is no me.
So even though you’re going through hard times and it seems like the battle will never end and you keep failing, you keep losing, just keep the faith. God is right there, He’s listening to us, and He knows what we’re going through. He’s just waiting for us to do things for ourselves so He can help us. Right now, I’m back drinking so it’s hard for me. But before I was drinking I was five months clean and I thought everything was going to go my way. Everything didn’t go my way. Whether I was drinking or not, I still had bad behaviors and those bad thoughts. He’s waiting for me to straighten up and fly right, and trust me, He’s waiting for you to straighten up and fly right. Everything will be well. Until next time. I’ll see you soon — take care and stay clean.
